I would like to share this excerpt from "OUr Daily Journey"...such a beautiful message addressed to the newly wed from a concern parent...and here it goes....
"You have now reached the time when your romance must die. In fact, it is necessary for romance to die in order that love may live and grow. Think of it this way: Your wedding marks the day when you plant the seed of romance. Romance is important;but it is not love itself;it is the seed of love-the seed of married love.
" Romance is a collection of pleasant emotions that come naturally with the anticipation of spending life together with the one you love. It is healthy and natural for you to have visions about the house in the suburbs, cuddly babies, and walks in the autumn woods with your perfectly lovable children skipping through the leaves.
"Yes, those times do indeed come- but they are mostly unplanned. And the moment will come when the pleasant emotions of romance are scattered by the winds of reality:burdensome car payments, orthodontist bills, sick babies wailing in the night, children fighting on the lawn and quarrels between the two of you. Then the towering flame of romance will dwindle- and sometimes even appear to be gone. The one you say you love has become unlovely. For a fleeting moment you allow the thought to cross your mind, " Do I really love him- Do I really love her- anymore? Is our love gone?"
" Don't you believe it! Its is at that moment when romance finally germinates into genuine love and begins to grow. On those days when it seems that nothing is left of your relationship but commitment, that is when God can teach you the great lesson that few people seem to understand: Love is not an emotion;it is an act if will. You are not declaring to everyone present today that you are "in love" but then you are now making a willful commitment " to love".
" Remember, your marriage can never be threatened by the loss of love, only by the loss of your personal commitment to love."---Dean Ohlman
This article moved me so much...reminding me of how I see my parents for decades as couple who seldom talks without heating into an argument.I really thought once how they have actually survived each day as partner. When both have different views or opinions. When both are dominants and no one stoops.And they end up fighting.I even questioned the integrity of thier love for each other.I never realized that love is beyond mushy lines, romantic objects and surprises....I was a big wrong...because the next morning ,after a big fight ,I still find them talking as if nothing happened. Could it be that they have learned to commit with love? I guess there's no question 'bout that...for love is something one can't just fathom by seeing how sweet lovers are...it's more than a will...it's a commitment.